Scarlet Letters

Divorce. The word that has been slithering and snaking it's way through my heart and mind for weeks, like the serpent himself. Turning my stomach in knots, threatening to cause tears to roll down my face. They never come. Divorce with a capital D, that may as well be the scarlet letter of the church. I remember naively thinking two things about divorce. 1) How could it be so painful when obviously these two people are choosing not to be married anymore for some reason. 2) How could a Christian commit this sin on purpose, when it's such a long process of sinfulness. I thought there MUST have been adultery involved, since that's the only "out" the Bible really gives. I placed my own scarlet letter on children of God, because I had no clue about the path they walked.

There are more appropriate letters to don.

"J" for judging without knowing anything.

"G" for gossip that gives us a gross rush and makes us feel a little more secure about ourselves.

"H" for hardness of heart instead of a heart of compassion and grace.

"L" for the logs in our own eyes we choose to ignore as we run around with tweezers trying to pull out the specks in the eye of our neighbor.

Amongst others. We're all wearing letters, some just hide it better than others.

What I have learned in this painful process of separation is that every marriage is unique and complicated. There are hundreds of thousands of interactions between two people that only God and they have witnessed. Each person come with their own vantage point. Their own interpretations of scripture, what is right and what is wrong. A divorce, and let's call it what it is: death of a marriage, is a long, painful, and confusing process that hurts many more people than the two who are torn apart. A pain I know nothing of quite yet.

I'm still hoping I never do.

My point is, that maybe we the fellow sinners, should quiet all of the accusing, speculating voices in our minds when it comes to a divorced or divorcing brother or sister and come alongside their shattered hearts with love and helping hands. Ask questions. Babysit kids. Pray for reconciliation. SOMETHING.

Maybe not advice though.

In the spirit of meeting at the broken bridge, maybe share your scarlet letter too. Imagine if the church was made up of a whole alphabet--no. BODY-- of honest, praying people? Would we hurt less as we lead each other to the foot of the cross, where our scarlet sins were washed white by the blood of the Lamb?

May we find healing in the scarlet letters of Jesus.